OF COURSE I WUV YEW!


Have you heard?

Hmm... Rain if I'm inside, snow if I'm out.


Do you love me?

PP: When you start something as a joke, and people latch onto it and just keep on running.

Last year, I started wearing the ugliest sweaters I could find (Sweaters given to me by my grandmother on christmas, sweaters given to my mother on christmas, ridiculous things) every Thursday. I told my friend Nick about it, and we decided to call it "Awesome sweater Thursdays." So, every Thursday, we began to wear these sweaters. Eventually, one of our teachers caught on and asked us about it. He thought it was hilarious and joined in. Fast forward a few months, There's an article about "Awesome Sweater Thursdays" in the school newspaper. My friend Nick and I have full credit for starting it, and yet they refuse to interview us so they can claim that it shows school spirit and panther pride and all that bullshit. There is now a group on Facebook for "Awesome sweater Thursdays." It was not created by Nick or me. It is not run by Nick or me. It is not run like Nick or me would run it.  I joined it just to tell them that I didn't like it.

I'm adopting Badger as my uncle.

Dude, I wish Badger was my uncle. He calls people "Young pups." That's awesome as hell.

My real life uncle is just a dick.

Today I learned that Articuno, Zapdos and Moltres are Unos, Dos and Tres. It blew my feeble mind when Dee told me that.

*Brains splat against computer screen, falls lifelessly to the floor*

*Crushes scouter in his palm*

PP: That stupid fucking god damned drumset in the god damned dining room.

The prince never really was very middle eastern in the games either, was he?

As he was the PRINCE of Persia, he was middle Eastern.

I know in the new one he's pretty much a North American, talks like one and everything.

He is actually a Persian, fun fact, as he is in Persia, and in that time period, if you were from North America, you were either a "native American" or an eskimo.

I admit that I could see Sammich posting most of those things.

AP: Firefly is on Hulu.

I do believe, ladies and gentlemen, that it is bonertime.

MARAUDER IS REALLY ROTTI LARGO THE LEAD SINGER OF THIRTY SECONDS TO MARS!!

Fix'd.

Inb4 Sammich says something about having sex with it!

PP: I'm pretty positive that people are getting a negative image of me from other people before they even talk to me.

Every once in a while, a musician feels so passionate about a cause that he or she writes a song to raise money for said cause. Since these songs are written to raise money for charity, it makes it all the more pitiable when they turn out to be enormous piles of crap, such as USA For Africa's "We Are The World" or Artists Against Apartheid's "Sun City". But the worst charity-based song ever written is "Do They Know It's Christmas?", the hit single recorded by Band Aid. Whereas the previous examples were written in earnest, Bob Geldof's message is downright patronizing. Lyrics that inform us that "there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas" are intentionally corny, gleefully penned by a condescending British musician to dupe those he considers his intellectual inferiors into throwing money at his cause. Of course there won't be fucking snow in Africa this Christmas. If there was, it would be environmentally catastrophic; the plants and animals indigenous to Africa are ill-equipped to deal with freezing temperatures. Also, I serious fucking doubt that all those starving Ethiopian children have warm winter jackets. Not only that, but Geldof intentionally misleads the listener into believing Africa is a barren desert "where nothing ever grows" and "where the only river flowing is the bitter sting of tears", neither of which is particularly true. Geldof knew this, of course, but he figured that the average English-speaking adult living in 1984 didn't. He very well may have been correct, but that doesn't fucking excuse him for writing a melodramatic, intellectually dishonest song and getting a bunch of obnoxious British pop icons to sing on it. In fact, both Paul McCartney and George Michael sang on "Do They Know It's Christmas", along with Phil Collins, Sting, Boy George, Banarama, David Bowie, Duran Duran, U2 and a bunch of other people that no one remembers anymore. You know, if someone had blown the studio while they were recording that song, I don't think there's a single person whose death I would have mourned. Well, I'd definitely miss David Bowie because he kicks major fucking ass, except that he wasn't in the studio with everyone else; he was busy, so he mailed in his vocal tracks. Unfortunately, Sir McCartney did the same. Oh well, at least all those other people would be dead. Anyone have a time machine?